And she didn't even charge me a co-pay.

Real live conversation I just had with neighbor Spanxy.

Spanxy: Do you feel better yet?

Me: Nope. But I slammed some theraflu and whiskey last night and antibiotics today. It's mostly just in my throat.

Spanxy: Oh my gosh, do you still have your tonsils?

Me: Yes.

Spanxy: THAT'S IT! They're a breeding ground for germs. You gotta get rid of them.

Me: My dad had his removed, and they grew back.

Spanxy: Yeah, so did Mr. Spanxy. But no one noticed because he's a middle child.

Me: I'm a middle child. Maybe that's why I have tonsils.

Spanxy: Well. You can't get them out now. You'll die.

Me: I'll die?

Spanxy: Yeah. Only kids can handle it.

Me: So, don't get them out?

Spanxy: Nope. You're too old. But hurry and get better, we've got a holiday weekend coming up.

Me. Right. Okay. I will.